The two weeks between Mark's birthday (May 4th) and the anniversary of his death (May 18th) are always a tough time for me. It brings back the emotions, the questions, and the blame for things I should have done. This year I was able to get away for a week of that time to trade an emotional mountain for real ones! I took this picture of Pike's Peak from Black Forest, Colorado while I was taking a walk with my sister and her two dogs. I've been to the top of Pike's Peak several times. The road winds back and forth across the mountain as you negotiate hairpin turn to hairpin turn. Your emotions can go from fear to thrill to "when are we going to get to the peak?" The ride can be stressful and long, but when you reach the top you see things from a completely different perspective.
That is similar to our grief journey. The twists and turns of grief can twist between anger, depression, and acceptance as you slowly journey up the slope of defining life after losing a child. It can be a long journey from one emotional turn to the next. Eventually, you reach the summit. Maybe you've found new meaning for your life. Maybe you are giving back to others in your community. Maybe it is just the passage of time. Hopefully, you get to the top of the mountain and see the view of your life from a new perspective. There can be purpose, hope, and meaning if you look for it. You only need to keep moving forward, taking one more step towards the summit.